During this relatively long trial by combat, John learned that his father was diagnosed with terminal cancer with whom he was very close. John knew immediately that this not only would be a tragic loss but he would be called upon to assist the family both emotionally and financially. To John, this was not how his life was to unfold. Presently, John is an angry person and an angry attorney.

Stressed and tired, John was in Court today. Unfortunately, the Judge reprimanded John for his unacceptable tone and unprofessional behavior against the Prosecutor and State's witness. John could not shake the Judge's comments regarding the difference between assertiveness vs. bullying. At first, John thought he was being singled out for zealously representing his client. However, that night John took a long look into the mirror and asked himself: "Am I too aggressive and unprofessional?" John decided to rethink how he was handling his emotions and anger. He also agreed to sharpen his anger management tools.

 

ANGER: THE LEGAL PROFESSION

Unfortunately, attorneys are said to be even more vulnerable to anger because of the adversarial nature of their profession, the fear of being perceived as weak, and the perception of some that anger can foster success. Realistically, the same components of professionalism: courtesy and civility, candor, loyalty to the client, meritorious claim, and zealous representation are affected directly by poor anger management skills.

 

Some suggestions are:

Take time to relax and enjoy hobbies, friends, family, and pets. Talk out minor problems before they escalate. Simplify your daily routine, and don't be afraid to say "no" to avoid getting stressed out.

Recognizing that much of his anger shared space with his deepest fears, our attorney John decided that he needed both an anger-management workshop and counseling. Additionally, John learned problem-solving techniques, stayed in shape, turned complaints into requests, learned to let go of resentments, and made sure that he put a statute of limitations on his anger.

For more information on this subject, or if you or someone you know needs support and help, contact the Delaware Lawyers Assistance Program (DE-LAP) at (302) 777-0124 or e-mail mvavala@de-lap.org